Thanks Manisha. It sure makes it a lot easier when it is a team concept. We talked about the above reference, about his fears and anxieties and he does have them. He says that is why he periodically asks me if it is okay if he spends the night here (he's been here the last three weeks) just for a status check. He is doing the status check! What a change that is.
Met with his T on my own today. She is good, reiterated about getting a life and that we need to have our own lives and not just be a couple, but also a vibrant individual. And I need to speak up and tell H that I'm going to be doing something and not feel the guilt. Working on that one. And get this, she has also done workshops with Michele, recommends DB to people, yet 16 months ago when I was searching for a T, the bb wrote back that there was no SBT in the area. Wish I would have found her instead of the horrible person we went to. But, H is also in a different frame of mind than where he was last year.
He told me tonight that he couldn't believe he almost threw this all away and he is more in love with me now than he has been in many years. And I think of the words that came out of his mouth not so long ago.
He still isn't wearing his wedding ring, though. Should I use my new "speak my mind" and ask him about it or wait it out and see when he puts it back on?
