Hi Jackie (((HUGS))) to you!

Sounds like things are going well with your H. I'd love to know what your code words are - I think I could implement that with my H around here.

You mentioned having no conflicts, but without the code words, you may have had some or at least some misunderstandings, so I'd say you two have come up with some very effective communication tools. And those tools help avoid conflict in a positive way!

Does that make sense to anyone?

And regarding the changes you want to make in yourself - I have lost 30# over the last year, only partly due to my H leaving.

But I have taken full advantage of it and I feel better (physically and mentally) about myself - better than I have in a long time. I bought all new lingerie, buy clothes that cling, wear v-necklines, wear a soft musky scent (that my H bought me for Christmas), etc.

I bought a leather skirt and I have never owned leather. I showed it to my H and said it was for a night out with him. Of course I haven't worn it yet - LOL!

I also got my hair highlighted and cut into a shorter sassy 'do. It's still long which H likes, but I can't pull it up into a pony tail when I am lazy. I make a point of wearing more than mascara most days - usually lipstick too.

So do it for yourself and see how your H reacts. Nice side benefit - I am sure that is partly responsible for my H wanting all the time! LOL!

You are doing great. I read your thread with great interest because as I always say, I hope my H will come home sometime soon.

You give me great hope, support and guidance. Your visits to my thread mean a lot to me. Keep up the great DBing. You rock!

I may even join the BFL with you gals. I would like to lose another 10 pounds, but will be happy maintaining this weight for life too. I didn't diet, I just cut back across the board and exercised at least 2 times a week for an hour in the pool. And chocolate remains one of my main food groups


totite "Accentuate the positive, eliminate the negative..."