A difficult question you ask, Grasshopper. (you might not remember that show)

Accuray and I have discussed this ad nauseum, he disagrees with me and Pema too, I guess.

I'm frustrated. Pema said that people don't "make you feel a certain way" but I can't help to find other words to describe it. I feel like she made me angry. My friend made me angry. And when I get this ugly feeling I start to think about my sitch and I get so angry at H and fall into self pity mode!

The relative made the comment for whatever reason they had, but it probably wasn't to make you angry. More likely they thought you would FINALLY get it! You reacted to it based on whatever feelings it stirred up in you and anger usually comes up because it masks hurt.

But you have a choice, delve deeper and uncover those feelings and why you have them or continue to be angry.

And I don't think there's anything wrong with feeling angry, just don't stay angry. Anger can spur you to change, anger can help you get at that's really bugging you.

I think you did that in this instance, you didn't react angrily, you said what you needed to say and left. You then started to explore why you felt that way when you got home.

This is when being able to accept and name all your feelings is helpful, meditation has helped me a lot with that.

With all you have going on in your life, I think you're doing great.

Me 57/H 58
M36 S 2.5yrs R 12/13

Let me give up the need to know why things happen as they do.
I will never know and constant wondering is constant suffering.
Caroline Myss