Tomorrow is a New Day

[hopefulinga]

H called a little while ago and told me he was getting ready to go out on a boat and wanted to talk to D. I see a small step here because he could have called her phone and not mine. And he did tell me what he was going to do and not just "Hi let me talk to D".

I was very up beat, asked him if he was having any better of a time and he said no.

He talked to D for about a minute and then she gave the phone back to me. A little bit more small talk.

I did tell him I loved him when I said goodbye this time and he just said ok, which is fine. I do not say it every time. I am aware that DB says not to say ILY. I go back and forth on whether or not I should. I get the not pressuring him, but I don't want him to think I'm not trying or have abandoned him.

Several years ago we went through some rough patches and some friends were aware of the tension. I started to read about filling his love bank, etc. I started trying to show him more respect. One of his friends told me that H was changing because I was showing him more affection.

I feel like this is one of those catch-22s for me.