My question is: Does this mean we need to change who we are in order to fit with what "the guy" can handle?
We men are brought up to suppress our emotions. As kids if we cry we're told to stop being babies. If we express that we want a certain toy we're told we're spoiled brats. If we talk about our feelings we're looked at like we're wimpy nerds. By the time we're in our 20's we've mastered the art of burying our feelings deep inside and never, ever crying. Women are the opposite, they're encouraged to express emotions, to cry (it's cute!), to open up to others. So what happens? Women try to tell men how they feel and the men run away. Women ask men how they feel and we say "fine". Up goes the wall.
So to answer your question, no, you should not change to fit what the guy can handle because that's a bandaid. The real fix is for the guy to learn that it is wrong and harmful to suppress emotions and he needs to learn to open up about how he feels. Get him to read the 5LL, it really opened my eyes on this.
