I would have sworn I had posted on your thread, but I don't see it. Maybe b/c the story is so familiar, IDK.
I wanted to respond to you being baffled by your W not undressing in front of you. This is usually not a good sign and that she has another man. A WAW believes she is completely finished with the M, and if she is in an EA/PA (or even wants to be involved with another man), it is like she's being "faithful" to him by not undressing in front of her H. Sick thinking, but I'm just saying........
As already stated, you need to proceed as though there is an EA (if not a PA) going on. She is not going to allow you to see any of their verbal contact. You've confronted her, warned her, and now she will be very careful not to give you any printed evidence.
If the WAW wants to be in an EA, she'll find a way. Instead of putting all the focus on the OM or the A, the LBH needs to become the best man he can possibly be. You'll hear that a lot around here, but it is deep stuff when you consider what all that involves. How many people work at being the best person they can possibly be?
What kind of man would that look like? What would you need to do to get there? Be realistic and set some goals as to what you can do to improve as a man, first of all....then as a H, father, and so on.
MR gets into trouble b/c somebody failed somebody somewhere. We all have faults and have some area of life we have let slide. Being the best does not mean you have to be perfect. It means setting a standard for yourself and striving to live by that standard every day.
It is not about what you feel should work in your M. It is about doing the work that gets the right results. Do what works!
