something that you said struck a chord with me and what NG said about how we hurt others out of our own pain and fear.
the past several days i have been thinking not so much as getting H back as my immediate goal, but trying to create more time (thats not really my point) but what has been floating to my surface is our communication and the way we interact. I have been very uncomfortable with the way we interact. its a soft passive aggressiveness that almost underlines anything we say to each other outside the safe circle of the kids.
i have been trying to reflect on this. because i don't like what it makes me feel and i don't like that i can't just converse with this man that will be in my life well...basically always...no matter what our legal status.
taking a step back is good i think. and i also have been very conscious of expectations i may have been holding on to since he has been back (that he would see my changes and it would make a difference).
i guess what i am trying to say is that like has been said, while we make our changes, we cannot expect our spouses to see, appreciate or react to them in the way we would hope. So the only thing we can do is encourage their best behavior...and i will add, respect.
the question is how? i am still figuring it out but am thinking its by continuing being our best, and respecting ourselves and loving ourselves.
i am diving in now....lets go find Calm and do a shot while we are at it.
((((( )))))
TPS Me: 44 H: 42 M14 T17 S10 D7 10/10 H moves out after death of his father-same month 21/04/12 H is 'DONE' 04/05/12 OW/PA confirmed (rumors from 2010) July '14 H ends affair May '15 H moves back home
