ss, maybe just sit on it for a few days and see what comes up. You're always pretty sure of your own mind. I think starting with #1 is a good idea, if he gets hinky about that, then you have your answer.
Me 57/H 58 M36 S 2.5yrs R 12/13
Let me give up the need to know why things happen as they do. I will never know and constant wondering is constant suffering. Caroline Myss
too late, bug! i just sent him the email. he's working at his office so i know he'll see it tonight. here it is:
"you asked me what i need. i thought long and hard and came up with 35 things. however, that might be a little overwhelming for anyone to read. so, i'm only telling you what i put as number one and what i would have to have from a husband. i wouldn't have to have it from a friend or a lover because they wouldn't mean that much to me. but from a husband, i consider it essential.
1. I need a man to feel that our relationship is the most important relationship in his life.
i think the other 34 things flow from this. i would like you to tell me what this would mean to you.
thank you, SS"
so, it's out there. and you're right, bug. if this bothers him then it won't work. i know because we've tried it without this and it didn't. and now, i can't go back. i've learned to love myself too much (from all of you and your great wisdom)!
M:63 H:53 S:41, SS:28, SS:25, SD:23 M:15 T:16
Bomb:12/17/11, "I think we should go our separate ways." H moves to his mother's house, 4/1/12 12/21/12: H moves back home, piecing
oh, i forgot to mention. he was here today to do some work around the house. i no longer stay when he comes over. i don't speak to him in person or on the phone nor do i see him. it's all over text and email. very polite and cordial but nevertheless, we are separate.
i came home to find a big letter saying how sorry he was for times he was an arrogant ASS and for acting like a SH!T in the past and he even listed some of the things he did that were thoughtless and cruel (two i had forgotten about).
this is BIG for him. he's never admitted to being the arrogant ASS and SH!T that he is before!
M:63 H:53 S:41, SS:28, SS:25, SD:23 M:15 T:16
Bomb:12/17/11, "I think we should go our separate ways." H moves to his mother's house, 4/1/12 12/21/12: H moves back home, piecing
SS, you are an inspiration. I am going to make a list too... both for the good things about me and another about the things I want in a W. Thank you dear friend!
Me(f): 51 W: 41 DP:8 M:3 T:10 "W not happy" 7/11 D final: 8/13
TPS Me: 44 H: 42 M14 T17 S10 D7 10/10 H moves out after death of his father-same month 21/04/12 H is 'DONE' 04/05/12 OW/PA confirmed (rumors from 2010) July '14 H ends affair May '15 H moves back home
Thank you SS for our sweet compliment You made me smile.
I started my list last night and honestly was a bit sad that W, right now, is not many of the things that I want in a W..
and that there were some that she has never been.. (i am not sure if one person could be all of them..i need to figure out which parts of my list are nonnegotiable.)
at the same time, i was also a bit excited about what it would be like to have a relationship with someone with some of those qualities.
ss, thank you for leading the way with your list... will we ever see you on the alt? (((((((((((((( ))))))))))))))
Me(f): 51 W: 41 DP:8 M:3 T:10 "W not happy" 7/11 D final: 8/13
You made me smile.