Can't hold a good woman down...Take me as I am...

[ces67]

Sorry, Ro. Sometimes these converations need to happen to create movement in our lives. At least that's how it worked for me.

So what do you want?

I'm really feeling like there is no hope, so #1 is looking like the safest option for my heart right now.

This last statement caught my eye. I may be off-base on this but as you state above, the lack of hope is a "feeling" and you have figured out by now that feelings change; they ebb, they flow, they alter as time moves on.

As far as "safe" Is there really safety in in loving someone? Is there really any guarantees? The hardest part to healing sometimes is that someone has to risk giving up their safety to love unconditionally.

I'm not there every day to see the interactions but from what you've put on this board, what you have done has had an impact whether you see it or not. The OW is now an after-thought and a regret to your H. You H is being kind and considerate to you. Your H has acknowledge the changes in you.

You decide when its over. And that is by all means your choice. Just be sure of what you want. Loving someone is a risk. And you are absolutely at risk of having your heart-broken again if he does leave. But you also have the chance of reconciliation and that won't come without taking a risk. They just go together. Every great success was achieved because someone risked putting themselves out there.

You're a good woman and I have not doubt that whatever happens, you will not stay down!