Mrs. D, I think all people make sense all the time-to them. I think what my H is doing makes sense to him and what your H is doing makes sense to him and what you're doing makes sense to you. Does it make sense to everyone? No. Right now you are looking at every little thing he does as a sign of something. It isn't. If and when he ever wants a R with you, he will let you know. You're trying to force an outcome and it will backfire on you.
I don't know more about the staying at his place other than you stayed at his place. That can mean any of a hundred different things. And now he could either feel positive about it(well, that wasn't so bad) or negative (I got trapped into that, I'd better be more careful the next time and stay very far away from her).
When people feel they aren't being listened to, they find other ways to get their point across.
Good luck.
Me 57/H 58 M36 S 2.5yrs R 12/13
Let me give up the need to know why things happen as they do. I will never know and constant wondering is constant suffering. Caroline Myss