Grace, of course it's all right. I respect your thoughts and opinion tremendously.
And you are right; the list is mostly compiled from my painful experiences with H, his family, and his daughter.
I will follow your advice and make it less about H and more about me. And, as I said above, number 1 really encompasses all the others, IMHO.

Bug, I think the deal breaker is having his daughter IN our marriage. But, if we follow number 1, that wouldn't happen.

I may just send him number 1 and ask him what that would mean to him. It could be a starting point?

M:63
H:53
S:41, SS:28, SS:25, SD:23
M:15
T:16

Bomb:12/17/11, "I think we should go our separate ways."
H moves to his mother's house, 4/1/12
12/21/12: H moves back home, piecing