sheesh vero - are you on a determined mission tonight to make me laugh so hard that there's no way i'll stop - ever!!
why i'm laughing is because it's uncanny - I did think that!!
at least that he had something to do with it. i know it's crazy, but while s and i were in Houston last week, i couldn't help wondering if h stopped by the house and "looked around" but that is ridiculous - he certainly didn't use it.
as for what you wrote;
Only until I can let out my anger in positive ways will I truly feel like the person I've always wanted to be.
if you could reframe that it may help you in unexpected ways.
Instead of thinking that could you think something like.
"I feel safe to face the betrayal and hurt that I feel right now. " (or whatever your real emotions are behind the anger)
"I feel safe in knowing that I am able to separate those feelings from the feelings of love and nurturing that I have for my children"
"My deep love for my children can and will override the negative emotions that I feel towards my H and ow"
one thing that you have to really really start believing with NO DOUBT in your heart , is that you can heal your children by healing yourself. Start with you, and the rest will just come , vero, I promise
I am curious that you put it as "letting your anger out" . what does that mean for you?
How do you see yourself letting the anger out in a positive way - can you imagine it literally?
How will you feel when that anger is let out? What will you do differently?
If you can let yourself imagine those things, guess what - you can circumvent the entire process by just doing already what you imagine you would be doing if you weren't angry. can you see how that may work?
what really helped me not go to the anger place and still does, was to start developing compassion - for myself and for others - especially h and ow. and that i learned from Pema.
in the first week after BD, a friend walked up to me at school and handed me Pema's first book. all she said was, i think this could help you now.
she gave me an incredibly wonderful gift that day..
vero - you have it in you already you know? all the love and compassion and caring and nurturing. you just have to let it blossom and trust that you can.
you don't need a kick in the back side - you need a boost to your self esteem as a mother. and that you can surely give to yourself.
"I am a wonderful caring nurturing mother and I have all the skills and ability to make my darling children feel nurtured and cared for completely"
{{{{{{{{ }}}}}}}}} zig
me 46 H 38 M10yrs T 11 S10 BD ow 8/11 h filed 9/25/12
"if i could define enlightenment briefly, i would say it is the quiet acceptance of what is"
