It's something we've always done from when we were first married and had a little 2-person tent and sleeping bags. We graduated to an air mattress later and then as the kids came along we went to bigger tents and then a pop-up camper. Then we had a truck camper and then finally an Airstream.
I loved it. I miss it. And I could do it alone. I've even looked at really small trailers I could tow with my little car. But it's so much more fun with someone.
For years our plan was to travel more in the trailer when the boys were older. I followed several blogs of people who do a lot of traveling that way and after the BD I just couldn't read them. Now I've started again and although I'm a bit sad, I am also determined to not let this sitch change plans I had before things went south.
When I came back from the Chicago trip I know I felt that I wanted someone to do fun things with. This feeling about travel and camping is the same, along with canoeing, fishing, biking, etc.
Fun to do solo but so much more enjoyable with someone you love. So, if it's not going to be him, I have decisions to make. My life is not getting longer and time's-a-wastin'.
That doesn't mean I'm putting an ad up on a dating site in the near future but a decision point is coming and I'm not afraid of it. Picture a diamond shape on a flow chart with the text: Is this working for me? and an arrow labeled YES and an arrow labeled NO.
At the present I'm feeling the arrow labeled NO leads to many more possibilities.
There was a message on my house phone yesterday from an old friend of H's from back in our hometown. They worked together 30 years ago. He called to let H know that one of their co-workers died. It was someone I know H liked and respected so I texted him and said I know you liked him, I'm sorry.
Later in the evening I get a long email from H telling me stories (he's a story teller) about this guy and what he meant to him and that he'd bought a pocket knife from him that he wishes he hadn't lost, etc...Not maudlin but just reminiscing.
I sent him a ((( )))
Yep, time's-a-wastin'
Me 57/H 58 M36 S 2.5yrs R 12/13
Let me give up the need to know why things happen as they do. I will never know and constant wondering is constant suffering. Caroline Myss
