Divorced #4

[Mrs D]

Why should it matter whether or not he's there. You go and have a good time. You informed him? That's all you had to do (and just because it's at your son's school). Stop focusing on him and what he does. You are all over the place MrsD. One second you say yeah, yeah, yeah this is who I want to be and the next you start worrying/thinking/talking about X again. Focus on yourself. YOU (and your kid)should be the only thing on your mind right now.

Take care girl.

You are right Arsene. Thanks again for the swift kick. Im going there for C, not X! I need to get off this obsessive roller coaster..

[labug]

Yes, you do and you are the only one who can do that. I wouldn't have texted him the time. He's an adult he can find out the time if he wants to know.

All you have to do is say Hello and then carry on with what you are there for, your son.

[Mrs D]

Can I tell you guys how much I love and appreciate you all so much!!

I shouldnt have texted it I know, but I told him I would, so I did.

[MrBond]

There's nothing wrong with what you did. It's called co-parenting.

[Carnac]

Im with Bond, as long as its strictly business to me its ok. I sent a text to my WAW just about an hour ago about my sons open house tonight to see if she was coming. She had some reason why she couldnt make it and sent one back saying she was glad I could make it, now that one I ignored, didnt really think it required any response and if she questions me about it later thats what i'll say to her as well.

MrsD you keep working on defining those goals, and figure out how to 'respond' to your ex instead of 'reacting' to your ex and you're going to feel so much better about things. Smile its Friday eve.

[Mrs D]

I think Im doing well with trying to step away from him though, no? I know the phone call last night was wrong, but if I hadnt have known about that whole conversation - other than picking C up from his Dads, and then the text message today - I havent spoke to him.

I know I need to rewrite them. I actually think "respond" instead of "react" should be one of those goals to be honest.

Today, a thought occured to me that if we would have tried to work out our marriage, and cancel the divorce - I dont know if we would have worked out anyway. I wasnt ready to make the changes. If we would have tried then, I wouldnt have completed the journey that I am now traveling - as hurtful as it is right now, God is working on me.

I also think that God is working on him. I see a bit of the roller coaster in some of his actions. I think hes somewhate confused. I honestly dont think we are finished writing our story.

I need to come back and re-read this when I get impatient or frustrated. And I need to let God take the wheel. HAppy Thursday/ Friday Eve!

[Brian in Hville]

Today, a thought occured to me that if we would have tried to work out our marriage, and cancel the divorce - I dont know if we would have worked out anyway. I wasnt ready to make the changes. If we would have tried then, I wouldnt have completed the journey that I am now traveling - as hurtful as it is right now, God is working on me.

That is a great attitude. Good job!!

I also think that God is working on him. I see a bit of the roller coaster in some of his actions. I think hes somewhate confused. I honestly dont think we are finished writing our story.

Though this isn't as "bad" as a few weeks ago, don't mind read. You have come a long way in this area as well. Proud of you.

I need to come back and re-read this when I get impatient or frustrated. And I need to let God take the wheel. HAppy Thursday/ Friday Eve!

My favorite quote when I was a youth minister..."Let go and let God!"

You really have come a long way in just a few weeks. You are doing good. Just keep it up. We are here for you!

[labug]

Point of clarification, with the info that you had told him you would text the time, I would have done the same.

But you know when you're texting just to let him know you're still around and when it's legitimate information sharing.

Go with your gut.

[Mrs D]

Yeah, it was just " Open house cookout starts at 5 with the open house/meet the teacher at 6." I havent texted anything since the "good luck to your future" one I sent Monday night. So I think its all good.

[Mrs D]

You know B... sometimes I think so, and then I take four steps back it seems. But can really say I feel stronger since Monday night. I really think Im starting to let go of him. Let him figure himself out as I do myself as well. I just dont believe our journey is done. Thanks for the kudos btw. We are getting Cs hair cut now. Then off to the open house. Dont know if he will be there. And to be honest ... dont care.