Dealing with Anger

[Arsene]

1. Where is the line between being kind, pleasant, funny, fun to be around and pursuing? How can I be loving and not be seen as pursuing?

If these things are what you want to do & are not tied to any outcome & expectation regarding your W's reaction then they are fine.

I would say though that you would need to be consistent with that behaviour and be the same around other family members & friends, or you could unknowingly be changing your behaviour around your W, hoping for but not expecting a reaction, which would be pursuing IMO.


Yeah, I think I agree with you on this.


I often think that I'll bump into the OM and wonder how I would behave. This hasn't happened yet for me, so my answer is hypothetical & I might react differently if / when it actually happens.

I would like think I would be the bigger man in that scenario, I shouldn't be the one who feels uncomfortable, that should lay solely on their shoulders.

In every possibilty of bumping into them W/ kids, W/ wife, alone, I know that I would not be violent and aggressive. The contact would be short as I would not want to be in their company for long. I would project myself confidently, without consideration for what they think or may feel.


This is true mate. I'm definitely going to work that into my contingency plan, whatever that may be.

Thanks for your input Bill.