There is a cute series of little kids books that have the word Pinkalicious in the title. The other day a friend had posted a link to the song "Red Rubber Ball" And my granddaughters had spent the night. I was sound asleep and was awakened by the sweet voice of the almost 3 year old saying: "Pinkalicious!"
And I got out of bed to watch the sunrise, it was a red rubber ball in a pinkalicious sky! So every morning I watch the sun come up and remind myself that indeed I think the worst is over now.
Here are all the lyrics, to save anyone the time it would take to google them:
I should have known you'd bid me farewell There's a lesson to be learned from this and I learned it very well Now, I know you're not the only starfish in the sea If I never hear your name again, it's all the same to me
And I think it's gonna be alright Yeah, the worst is over now The mornin' sun is shinin' like a red rubber ball
You never care for secrets I confide For you, I'm just an ornament, somethin' for your pride Always runnin', never carin', that's the life you live Stolen minutes of your time were all you had to give
And I think it's gonna be alright Yeah, the worst is over now The mornin' sun is shinin' like a red rubber ball
The story's in the past with nothin' to recall I've got my life to live and I don't need you at all The roller-coaster ride we took is nearly at an end I bought my ticket with my tears, that's all I'm gonna spend
And I think it's gonna be alright Yeah, the worst is over now The mornin' sun is shinin' like a red rubber ball
Oh, I think it's gonna be alright Yeah, the worst is over now The mornin' sun is shinin' like a red rubber ball
Love You Internet Friends!
Me 57 XH 58 Sons age 32 & 27 M:32 D final 9/12 Bought 10 Acres and Living the Dream!
I also just had a tough conversation with my S22. He was cleaning out his car and left a bunch of stuff on the workbench by the backdoor. I tidied it into a pile and found a journal. I read it, and it made me cry. And of course he drove up and caught me. He wasn't mad. I asked him about some stuff in it. He wants to stay with me, he wants to go to yoga with me, he wants to have a family game night once a week. I talked to him and all he could say was he feels connected to me, but totally disconnected to his dad.
And now I'm crying again. Nothing will ever be the same. Boys should have a relationship with their fathers. But I can't fix or change any of this. It is up to him to talk to his sons. He was gone a whole week and didn't text or call either boy. He returned a call from S27 and sent a text to S22 for when he wanted picked up at the airport. That is it.
Oh well, off to finish a quilt. Maybe I should sew my mouth shut? I am in a mood!
Me 57 XH 58 Sons age 32 & 27 M:32 D final 9/12 Bought 10 Acres and Living the Dream!
My S25 feels pretty much the same. He told me he's cross with his dad, 'cause he didn't have the decency to tell he was leaving. He never does anyway for his trips, so why would moving from home be any different. D19 says nothing.
Me:57 H:52 M:28 Got another lawyer last year and filed. D35,S/D twins28,D22 EA4/04 End? Who knows? "Life is like a mirror. Smile at it and it smiles back at you." — Peace Pilgrim
Me:57 H:52 M:28 Got another lawyer last year and filed. D35,S/D twins28,D22 EA4/04 End? Who knows? "Life is like a mirror. Smile at it and it smiles back at you." — Peace Pilgrim
Total armchair psychology here but WTH! I think our Hs, being of the age they are think that their sons don't need as much from them as they get older because they didn't get that from their fathers.
And look how well they turned out.
I think there's also some shame involved.
Just call me Lucy (from Charlie Brown) The Doctor is out now!
Me 57/H 58 M36 S 2.5yrs R 12/13
Let me give up the need to know why things happen as they do. I will never know and constant wondering is constant suffering. Caroline Myss
About the relationship he has w/his sons right now...it's going to be hit. As he travels through is journey, it is all about him. Further along, he will want to reconnect w/his sons. Most, if not all of them disconnect from their children, but there is always one child that they are extremely close to and I call that child the "pal" during the crisis. It will be the child that doesn't question or challenge him/her about what she is doing. Right now, the relationships can't be repaired...they will need to work that out at some point on their own...but in time, your h will begin to change his course just a little bit and may want to reconnect w/all of them. Let's hope and pray that your h is one of them that will do this.
Hang in there. Cry when you feel the need to...it's okay.
Sit quietly, the answers will reveal themselves when you least expect them to. The past is gone, the present is a gift and you need to focus on today, allow the future to reveal itself when it is ready.
My H does try, but only when I tell him. He's always saying, "give me some tips." WTF! S25 isn't a project, and I hate to tell H what my son has told me in confidence. But I do give him "tips" sometimes, when I think it appropriate. He tries, then stops when he doesn't see instant success. S25 is very sensitive where his dad is concerned. He feels they've never really connected, although I thought they did when he was a preteen. My H had a very awkward R with his dad. Neither of them tried. I always say to H, "S25 is a man now, you can't treat him like a little boy anymore." One day it'll sink in, I hope.
Me:57 H:52 M:28 Got another lawyer last year and filed. D35,S/D twins28,D22 EA4/04 End? Who knows? "Life is like a mirror. Smile at it and it smiles back at you." — Peace Pilgrim
I just got home from a birthday party for a dog. My DIL's sister's. Yes I took one of my dogs.....
While there my S27 told me his dad doesn't seem right, that he seems very different and befuddled. He opinied his dad has a brain tumor. I actually didn't know what to say. I just listened. S27 went on to say he hopes some day his dad sees what he is doing to the kids, meaning our grandkids. I told him things would work out. LAME.
I finished 1 of 3 quilts I was supposed to finish. What a wacky month this has been. I feel like I just never get caught up. Tomorrow I go help set up the quilt booths at the Womens Expo.
I went out on a limb and entered a SUP (Standup Paddleboard) race. This is way out of my comfort zone, but I need to do something for me. One of the counselors at my weight loss program does a lot of SUP stuff. He said I might be last but at least I will have been there.
It is a 1.5 mile race around Chinamans Hat. There will be safety boats there and it is probably the best way to do something like that. The reason I found out about the race was because I was asking the SUP counselor about two people riding together on one board.
NG/CT was being really bossy and told me that we were going to take my board out around Chinamans Hat. I thought that sounded like a terrible idea. I told him we could rent a board for him and each paddle our own board. He was just insisting we could go on mine. I settled it by claiming a headache and cancelling our outing.
Anyway SUP counselor said, NO, one person per board as designed! And then brought up the race which happens to be next Saturday. I have not told NG/CT about it. He just really isn't my cup of tea, and I hope he finds some nice likes to be bossed around gal. He was being so bossy when we went to lunch the other day I told him I was going to leave him on the other side of the island to walk home. I ment it, too!
I am pretty sure he isn't exactly thinking I'm his steady. Last time I saw him he pulled up his profile on the dating site we met on and asked me what I thought of a new photo he put up of himself. Then pulled up my profile and made some suggestions for changes he thought I should make. (I need a better main photo, as he thinks I'm not smiling enough in the one I posted!)
Dang I have a fine Crazy Magnet!
Me 57 XH 58 Sons age 32 & 27 M:32 D final 9/12 Bought 10 Acres and Living the Dream!
Wendy, I had to chuckle about the birthday part for your DIL's sister's dog. I went to a "puppy" shower many years ago and that was fun, but different.
I'm glad to see that you are trying different things. If you finish last, so what...at least you will have tried the SUP and had fun in the process.
I don't know about the NG/CT person. I don't blame you, I would have canceled too. I wonder why he was insistent on wanting to use your board and not a rental...I wouldn't allow him too much say over you or what you are doing...he sounds like he may have a control issue.
BTW, I'm glad your son has noticed the changes in your h. Your h isn't able to keep his behavior hidden very well. I, too, thought my xh had a brain tumor, but it ended up being mlc.
Yes, you do have a fine crazy magnet!
Enjoy your weekend!
Sit quietly, the answers will reveal themselves when you least expect them to. The past is gone, the present is a gift and you need to focus on today, allow the future to reveal itself when it is ready.
Sheesh! You don't need some dude telling you what to do. You're perfectly capable of making your own decisions. WTH!
Me:57 H:52 M:28 Got another lawyer last year and filed. D35,S/D twins28,D22 EA4/04 End? Who knows? "Life is like a mirror. Smile at it and it smiles back at you." — Peace Pilgrim
