Tomorrow is a New Day

[hopefulinga]

I am again questioning whether or not this M is worth it.

I stopped by the airport so D16 could see her dad and get a soda. We made some small talk and then he says something about putting an alarm system in for a friend and then Wow, D16, I get to go for a motorcycle ride, FL and an airshow all in one month.

Yes, he's made plans for the only weekend he would be home this month. I told him that I was thinking about going to PA, and he said, well go then. I told him that I could not go if he was not around because I was not bringing D with me. I also said that I had asked him to check in with me or let me know when he made plans. He stumbled around that and then said it wasn't definite. I told him he would be gone for 6 weeks in a row and he didn't get it. He doesn't get that he's planned stuff for 6 weekends in a row.

I told him that I needed some down time and he said "So I do, big time." I understand how busy and stressed out he's been, but really, 6 weekends away? And he hangs out with his buds every evening from whenever he stops working until 7:30 at the earliest. Am I asking too much? He has no idea what it is like to do what I do everyday. The closest he came was when I was in DC. And I know that he went about his business and ignored D for most of the time I was gone.

I am really about to crack and I don't know how much longer I am going to be able to do a 180 on this one and not pop. I keep thinkning "Well Mr I want a D, how would this work if we were separated like you want? You certainly cannot think I would take D for 6 weekends straight when you want 50/50 custody."

I also feel like I am going to lose my mind. While I can get someone to stay with her for a little bit, I can't for days at a time. And spending $8-10/hr makes doing things not fun.

This is beyond a one way street. It is a freight train. I cannot tell if this is his way of pushing me out or basically doing an in-house D.