One thing I learned from my marriage falling apart was the "all or nothing" attitude. I have learned in my new R to compromise more. To know when something REALLY is a deal breaker. To look at the big picture. And to not issue ultimatums.
One thing that I would improve in my new R would be the ability to discuss the future. Josh is noncommittal. I always wanted to remarry. It seems to be the one thing we can't really talk about. When I do - he never gets angry - just smiles and changes the subject. For me - I had to learn that this might be the one thing we will never agree on but when I look at the rest - it's just all so wonderful. And buying a house together was a huge commitment on his part. So I let it go.
So - I guess you have to be REALLY clear with yourself about what you really want and what you can let go. And no one else can decide that for you.
