But I really dont think I ever left. Not even in my head. I think it was more about the attention I was getting.. ??
Goals.. yeah. Ive set them. But they were hard for me to write because we didnt fight. We were best friends. When I had the fling, yes there were problems then - but it was things he wasnt providing. He tried to fix them after. I couldnt forgive myself for that one night. That is actually one of my goals for myself. To be able tio forgive myself. Still working on it...
That is your perception of things & there are always 2 sides on how things are perceived...That is the unfortunate part of perfecting communication skills!
We all make mistakes & yes yours is deemed a large one, but you do have to forgive yourself. I made lots of mistakes. Drank way too much right after layoff & bankruptcy, but she told me what I was doing wrong in a plain and simple manner, so I went to AA meeting & got myself back on track for about a year. I slowly got back into social drinking & totally controlled it, which she admitted...But then the unhappiness & black hole set in, which in turn was projected out onto her. She tried her damndest to make things happy for me & supported every hair brain idea i had to get out of where we currently live etc...But in reality none of that would have helped either, cause my self-confidence & leadership took such a down-word spiral she eventually broke.
I in no way condone or agree with going out & having an A such as her,l but empathize & can see why she is!! [censored] oh yeah, but understand how how I could have broke her last shred of trying.
