I'd like to share with you something that my W told me last week. When she all hurting, confused and gave me the "not in love with you" speech, and I flipped out, pleading, clinging, angry, etc...it scared her, a lot. She had thought all these years that I was strong enough to handle anything, that I could adapt to whatever life threw at me/us/our family...when I didn't adapt/handle/whatever her crisis well, her security was yanked out, her faith in me/us questioned. The more I pursued, the worse it got, the more scared, etc., she became.
Then all the anger at her father, life, childhood, everything negative in our whole marriage got directed at me...and justified what she was doing in her mind.
Lucky for you, your W isnt in mlc crazy land, your W is rational.
Lucky for me, I figured out my sh!t and backed off and figured out what kind of man/husband/father I was going to be, and that, yes, I did have it in me to get through anything and did not "need" W...as much as I want(ed) W, so I could hold myself strong and be the rock, the lighthouse.
I hope that helps clarify some of my points above, PW.
T^2
In the depths of winter, I finally learned that within me there lay an invincible summer. - Albert Camus
Uncertainty is the very condition which impels people to unfold their powers.-Eric Fromm
