Emotional affair

[greatwhitenorth]

Good job keeping your cool. Serious boundaries are required.
Two thoughts come to mind:
1. All contact with OW and the others MUST STOP, and
2. He MUST deal with his drug use and the things that drove him to it. He MUST do this work on his own. You can support him but that's it.

This must happen before you even consider reconciliation. Otherwise a backslide is highly likely.

As a user and possibly an addict he could very easily be svcked back in. He might even have something cooking with OW now. He must prove himself to earn your trust. Because there are serious drugs involved, until he proves himself it would be unwise to trust him.

So what do these boundaries look like to you?

The vets will no doubt have much more to say.
You've done well. Good luck.