“Here I think that you have rely on the "believe zero of what they say and only half of what they do" rule.
My guess is that she doesn't really know what she wants right now. My W spent many, many months in that state. I believe that she probably changed her mind on a daily, maybe even an hourly, basis.
Remember that ^^ is very hard and stressful on the WAS.
Right now, I think that you should give her the time and space that she needs to figure things out.”
Absolutely Denver, “change her mind on an hourly basis”, too funny!!! I 100% agree that my W is confused and doesn’t know what she wants right now. You are really helping to give me clarity. I feel I am doing a good job giving her time and space.
“If she was having a PA, how would that change what you are doing? Are you merely afraid of having to deal with the pain of such information?”
You said that in the initial months of your separation that it probably worked to your benefit not knowing about the A. Once again, I 100% agree with you, I feel the same. I don’t know if having a confirmation of an A would change what I am doing, it’s too hard for me to tell because I haven’t been through it, so I just don’t know. Yes, the pain of such information would be VERY hard. You said it’s the hardest thing you dealt with. I can’t even imagine Denver, unless I go through it. There’s a decent chance that I will eventually have to go through that unimaginable and brutal realization.
You mentioned that if we ever get to the reconcile stage that it would be a good idea to work through the subject. I agree and it's on the back burner for now. Yes, I am brushing it under the table for now but I am sure it’s probably going to need to be addressed and worked through at some point.
I want to respond to the rest of your post a bit later, thanks Denver. Class of 2012, I am thinking of all you guys! Suppo, I watched the warrior youtube video, amazing lyrics.
