And while I was writing my last post, W texted to tell me she'll be down in exactly a month to get the rest of her stuff. She says that's the only weekend that she can "bring help"...
Kinda puts me in a weird situation, as I'd like to be able to talk with her alone when she comes down, but if she's bringing along help, that seems less likely to occur...
Should I offer to help her myself?
If it were me, I would say "I can help you, if it means you can come alone. I've been thinking a lot about our situation, and beginning to make some decisions, and I'd like to have an opportunity to talk privately with you when you come down. I think the two of us can handle the stuff, don't you?"
This does three things. One, it's LEADING -- it lets her know that she's not the only one driving the bus here, with you waiting around like a puppy dog to see what she decides. Two, it gives you the private one-on-one to have "The Talk" when she comes down.
So what's "Three?" Three is, a little old-fashioned infidelitus interruptus never hurts. If you give her a whole month to squirm and wonder "What has he decided? What is it he wants to talk to me about when I come down, that he wants to be private? WHAT'S IN HIS HEAD??!! Am I losing him as my fallback option??!"
