MrsD, I just want to point out that No Contact...

IS FOR YOU.

Nothing in DB is intended to be a tactic.

While it can be argued that anything about trying to fix a M is a tactic...

the reality is...

based on DB efforts...

we DO for US...

and...

a side benefit might be that we R or save the M... or in your case... you and your H reconnect and possibly get back together.

The REASON that No Contact is FOR US...

Is because IF we cannot deal with contact, IF we are being abused, IF we need to protect ourselves emotionally and/or physically...

then, No Contact IS appropriate...

Otherwise, No Contact is just an attempt to have your H start chasing you. The thought on that is people (men) want what they cannot have.

If that were the case, then there would be men chasing after every woman they cannot have... that does not seem to be the case... from where I sit...

Your H has a GF...

You NEED to personally grow, become the best / better woman that you can be, AND... your H needs to know this...

the only way he can know this is by you being available to him so he can see it...

but...

he can not have it...

because he has a GF...

make sense?