Divorced #3

[Mrs D]

I think contact sends you spinning, MrsD. That's not a criticism -- just an observation -- but it's the reason why I tried to encourage you to let him go completely (even though you wouldn't be letting him go, and still holding on to your hope, which is FINE). I just don't think you're to the place, emotionally, where you can pull it off yet.

I would like to read more posts about YOU, and what YOU are doing to move on with your life. All I hear about is ex-husband, ex-husband, ex-husband.

Are you familiar with the Stockdale Paradox? It is the best framework I've seen for doing this whole "hope" vs. "brutal reality" balancing act that needs to be done. You might want to Google it.


Starsky [/quote]

You are right Starksy. It does send me spinning because I do miss him so much. I do sit and over think everything. I fear letting him go because it seems that its what I had done while we were in a relationship. I didnt make him my number one. Something in my mind tells me if I act as if I dont really care what hes doing, Ill lose him further. Im afraid of not letting him know what I am doing when Im doing stuff because thats what I had done before. I just want to do whats right, you know?

Googling stockdale paradox now.. thank you.