To Lovingly Detach

[Arsene]

"Staying angry to punish someone else, is like lighting yourself on fire to get smoke in their eyes."[/b] and it rang true for me.

Thanks for sharing this 25. It does help to see it in that way, and it rings so true. In my case I feel like it's sadness that I can't shake. Sometimes, I think that if I didn't stop myself, I would like to show her how sad I am to make her feel guilty. But I don't do this anymore. I guess the same principle applies. I would be setting myself on fire to get smoke in her eyes(if at all).

I won't lie to you, there is still anger within me but most of the time, I can control it. When I feel it come to the surface, I force it away, bringing unconditional love to the rescue. I chase negative thoughts I might occasionally have about her by telling myself: "This is the woman you love that you are thinking about!!". I used to come here to vent it away for your reading displeasure, but this is something I try not to do anymore. I try to address it and un-rationalize it before it escalates to this point. But I also know that I haven't conquered all of my faults just yet, and I know that my anger still has the potential to jump out of the shadows, unchecked at the first sign of attack (true or perceived) from her. My anger is what broke my marriage 2-3 years ago. It is/was my worst sin and the first one I worked on eliminating. I'm still at it.

Cheers,