Ease on down the road....

[Valeska19]

Hey DG,
I know the 27th is only a few days away. Lots of prayers heading your way darling.

You will be okay. More than okay!

((( )))

[~¤DG¤~]

Hi guys.

Well, tomorrow is the day. I am sure our D will be final. I have mixed emotions about this.
Last week I had a lot of anxiety, to the point where one evening all I did was cry and honestly felt like I didn't want to live. I know that my thoughts were irrational and I would never do anything to harm myself or hurt my family in any way, I just felt sad. However, after a good night's sleep I felt better, and have been ok since.

I am attending the hearing via telephone. Work is very hectic right now and I can't take time off, so I will use that time as my lunch hour. It really shouldn't take very long, there isn't anything to divide really.

Even though my M wasn't busted, I still believe in the principles I learned in the DR book. It put a lot of things in to perspective for me, and in the end is making me a better person.

[Rick1963]

(((DG))) hope u. are doing ok. My D is today and can sympathazie how you felt. Thinking of u

[Brian in Hville]

Sending you some love DG...

[~¤DG¤~]

Well, it is final, and I am still alive.

I did end up attending the hearing, they were running behind and I could try to keep calling every 15 minutes, go there and wait or reschedule. After dealing with this emotional rollercoaster for as long as I have I couldn't reschedule, so I went. Ex-H was not expecting to see me, he did a double take when I walked in, but we didn't speak. We weren't allowed to even if we wanted to.

I held my composure pretty well. I'll admit I did shed some tears, but I did pretty good.

It was over in 15 minutes.

After, when we were sitting in the hall, he told me that I am so much better off without him. I told him that if that is what he wants to tell himself, I can't stop him.

I got in to my vehicle and sobbed for a good 15 minutes before I could pull myself together enough to drive.

As hard as it was, I am glad it is over and done with.

I feel like I did when H first left. I haven't been able to sleep, or eat, and I can't stop crying. I am seeing my C on Thursday and I have a feeling I'll be going frequently again.