it seems like the quote from dbmod was meant to be posted into another thread. maybe there it is more relevant.
but I don't know whether the couple described ("old man and old lady in the grocery store where it is clear that he is doing HER bidding") is necessarily a "passive" man. if "they are clearly so close" then maybe he is just a *considerate* man, and he just *seems* to be "doing her bidding" because they have been together for years and are of one mind. or because he loves her and enjoys making her happy - so if she says "let's get this brand of coffee instead of that one" he doesn't really care about which brand of coffee, maybe it's all the same to him, but he *does* care about her, so whatever brand of coffee she wants is fine with him. and then maybe in the next aisle, he says "let's get this brand of tuna instead of that one" and she smiles and says, "yes, dear" because she doesn't care about which brand of tuna but she cares about him. what does this have to do with "passive"?
but I am guessing that dbmod's comment was in reply to someone who thought that a man needs to tell a woman what to do in order for her to "respect" him. sometimes what she respects is that he cares about her and respects her! and doesn't just order her around. I would call that "considerate", not "passive".
