Can Turtles climb?

[hopefulinga]

i can suddenly see how much leading i have done during our m as well as during this last year.

and so i finally figured out what doesn't work. now i just have to figure out how to turn that around for myself

the ironic thing is i never wanted to be the leader in the first place - i feel that i got it placed on me, because h didn't know how to or because of his own issues won't step up

and i took over the fixer role so there was some semblance of order...

so a vicious circle - that compounded itself - and still is.

now it's time for me to figure out how to break the pattern and do something different.

I'm with you on this one and am struggling with it. I would love to take a backseat and not have some much responsibility. It's tiring. And I would love to be the vulnerable one that needs help. So breaking the pattern of H not stepping up to the plate, forcing us to be the fixers. Wow, that's huge.

And I am impressed about your conversation with H today and that you were able to share your feelings and get a response from him where he recognized that he didn't realize how he was affecting you.