Yeah, I know better then to do something like that. Just venting.
I went to drop off the kids with W. Seeing her for just 5 minutes and then I always leave feeling so darn sad. It’s so pathetic because I get dressed up in my nice clothes just to come home and get right back into my casual attire. I don’t know what kind of effect my last email had on W, I guess it doesnt really matter though. The only response I received was today she told me that I can get the school supplies for our son.
I really wish I could have more good days, I really do. The only one that can make my days good is ME. It’s so hard in this time of adversity. I sometimes wonder if this stuff is a bit easier on the WAS.
I was talking with a friend yesterday and I mentioned that this whole ordeal is making me much more self sufficient and even though my post sounds like I am a downer, I am becoming a stronger person because of it. I have a hard time finding the benefit in that because I would rather this never happened. 15 years with this woman, that’s a long freakin time!!!!!
I don’t want to go out, I don’t want to do other things but I know it's important. I used to love it when W gave me a hall pass. I don’t need a hall pass anymore but there’s no glory in that. I just want to be with my family but I know I can’t under the present circumstances.
Me(M):38 W:43 T: 15 M: 12 S: 8 D: 4 W wanted separation 5/5 Stopped living together 5/5
“Nothing can stop the man with the right mental attitude from achieving his goal; nothing on earth can help the man with the wrong mental attitude”. Thomas Jefferson
