As hard as it is for me to say (and I still don't 100% believe it) It's time to change the dynamic here... It's so hard to say that because I can look closely and see all sorts of positive signs of change between us... the sweet emails she sends on occasion, the nice conversations, the random texts about almost nothing... All signs that things are continuing on a path that I'm looking to be on... one which we end up back together and happier than ever...
Alk,
Don't mean to be a ball-buster, but I wanted to circle back to this, because I think it's very important. You DO see that she's only doing these things to keep you controlled, as a viable backup option while she pursues her fantasy with OM, don't you?
From my personal archives:
On “Doing What Works”:
One of the misconceptions about DBing, in my opinion, is the "Do what works" thing. The problem is that people mis-define "works" as being "what doesn't make her/him angry" and "what makes her/him act nice towards me." Instead of as "what moves me further along down the path toward a mutually-healthy and committed marriage."
Sometimes one has to take a short-term "hit" in the "nice" department in order to solidify a healthier, longer-term gain.
