I know it must seem horrible today but I can honestly say (and you know I've been one of your toughest critics) that there will be progress. There is movement in this situation and that is so much better than sitting stagnant.
First - your son is in counselling. This is and was the most important thing. Get him on the right track. Second - your kids are both living where they choose to live and those places are SAFE. Third - You are staying in daily contact with them. That is VITAL in this situation. They need daily reminders of your love and support. Fourth - You got an attorney and despite the fact the kids can (and should) choose where they live - you are getting the legal advice you need Fifth - Ex has moved out of State. Hope the door didn't hit her on the way out. This HAS to relieve you of some of your stress.
Why bother suing her? Let her go. Your support payments should be going to your daughter's friend's parents to assist in her housing and food and also to her for clothing, school expenses etc and also to your son's grandmother for his care in the same manner. If you pay spousal support - that should end. But your attorney can sort this out for you.
Are you also in counselling? You need to deal with your anger and depression. You need to see that there is life after divorce. Many of us here are living proof of that. We not only survived - we thrived. But it took a lot of work, counselling, time and effort to get to the "other side". I want to see that for you as well. But you have to do the work.
Antlers - your post has made my day. I know it seems like you're in the depths of despair - but trust me - you're getting through the worst now and you WILL see improvement from here on.
