Alien Invasion Pt 2

[bustingout]

hope you have a better day too GB.
((()))

[reachingHigher]

GB, one of the reasons I first visited your thread was I was intrigued by your user name. Then I looked at the exchanges between you and tvs, and I was attracted by the warm and caring friendship with the element of lightheartedness that had developed between you two. I thought "I'd like to be a part of that too!"

You have a lovely and tender heart, mixed with a strong commitment. Oh, can H see what he has and what he is missing by being the alien?

A story on him asking what's wrong. In April or so, my H was leaving our place and I had held it together the whole time he was here but started to cry when he left. He looked at me and said "are you crying about something new or the same old thing?". I said, "same thing". That's all he needed to know and drove away. Way to a woman's heart, eh?

[GALbaby]

UUUGGGGHHHH..men they are so dumb sometimes.

Haven't got much to report. When I arrived home H was preparing dinner (he has been home with a bad back). I just tried to act normal and there was no further conversation. My S18 is upset though. He was in the room when that happened yesterday.

He said to me later "I can't believe dad finally acted interested in you and you wouldn't tell him what was going on. You missed your chance". I tried to explain that as son was on the way to a Uni exam, I didn't think it was a good idea to upset him, also I needed to be unemotional before I spoke with H about anything. Son seemed to understand.

I'll speak with DB coach tonight and see what she suggests. I'm still shaken today but better, thanks TVS, RH and BO.

[reachingHigher]

GB, just checking in with you. You sound so logical and practical, two qualities I admire. And qualities that are easy to live with.

I am looking forward to hearing how the counseling with DB coach goes!

[GALbaby]

Hi guys, feeling much better about things today, thanks so much for your support. I cried again when I read your beautiful words. Unbelievable how total strangers across the world can mean such a lot to me. You are real people with your own problems and can still reach out to a total stranger. I have heard it said we are all connected and I guess we are.

DB coach said I am doing an excellent job DB'ing. She agrees that, because H has made no further attempts to create another life for himself, is mostly attentive to me (not affectionate) and there has been no further D talk or conflict, that he is in a place where he is reconsidering, but because he is a MLC male, he won't apologise or admit a mistake. We both agree he is waiting for me to fix everying because he doesn't know how to and still save face. He is so stubborn. UUrrggh! I am to continue doing what I am doing, but step up the non-sexual flirting and small acts of affection, and also try to initiate some social activities perhaps with other friends, which I have already started. Keep it fun, non threatening and patience, patience, patience. It will take time.

Mostly, she was concerned about me and how I was handling the stress and she discussed with me very compassionately, what I was doing to take care of myself. She said that the fact that I didn't want to talk about my problems with him the other day was probably a good thing, because it showed H that I have become an independant person who can manage my stresses and then return to a calm state of mind. Although she also suggested I should thank him for his concern and I am fine now. Good advice I feel.

Hope you guys are doing well, and maybe this will help you keep on your journeys also. I am feeling motivated again to keep working.

[Takevowsserious]

Hey Gal!

Was waiting to hear from you. Soooo glad you are feeling better and are in a more positive place.

Sounds like a very productive session with DB coach. See, you are doing great! I guess we have to learn to expect those bad days and emotional moments and to take them in stride.

I am glad everyday that we found each other here. It is hard because often times family and friends, who even though they love and care about us, really don't understand what we are going through and what we are trying to do. You can't imagine what an alien spouse is till you live with one!!!

You are a strong woman, and I know you will continue to bounce back after a bad day. Stay strong! Think about how far you have come already, and the excitement of finding out where your journey will lead you.

Have a great evening

[GALbaby]

Hi again TVS. Thought i'd update you again. As H was pulling out of the driveway to leave for work (again suggested by DB coach so as not to give him a chance to engage in R talk). I said "thanks for your concern the other day, but I am fine now". His response "yeah what was going on?".....der!!!

I said "lots going on with me but I'm good now". His response "what about me?". I then went on to say "I know you have got enough on your plate without me concerning you with my problems, so I didn't want to worry you".

Hahahahaha ..his concern for me was very short lived. I can laugh really hard about it now.

[reachingHigher]

GB, thanks for sharing about the DB session. It helps so much to hear their advice.

I'm so glad you found motivation to go on and to be strong yourself and have hope for the two of you.

When is the first dance lesson?

[GALbaby]

Hi RH. Glad you found it helpful. I have to get together with my GF and make a booking for the first lesson. Two private and 8 group lessons. So hopefully it will be soon.

BTW when I told H I was going to ballroom dance lessons, he went quiet. I'm not called GALbaby for nothing!

[Takevowsserious]

You handled that perfect Gal! "what about me?"... Another MLC anthem. Maybe you should get him a bumper sticker that says exactly that!

I love that your dance lessons will be starting soon. Since he likes modeling clothes, maybe you need to model a new pair of dancing heels for him

You're right, they don't call you GAL baby for nothing!!!