The most important part about a double bind is to know that the only way out of one is to remove yourself from it.
You need to make it a non-issue in your own mind. How ever that might look, for you. Then, you can see it objectively. And do nothing about it. Because it's a non-issue and you have accepted that it is what it is.
You are not STILL there... you've come around... much of this stuff we re-visit and that is good, because each go around, we learn more.
You do not have to find the greatness in your H....
I'll help you with this one...
You will ENCOURAGE the greatness in your H. His potential...
"H. You are a great father to S and I know you would never do anything to harm him."
You are simply encouraging your H in his potential greatness.
He still may introduce S to OW. That is out of your hands. What he MAY do is, BE in his greatness and do no harm to his and your S.
