This may be cryptic, I know you are ready to work through this:

Acceptance...

You are trying to solve a problem that may have no solution...

Because it is a double bind... and this one... might be created by both of you...

The only way out of a double bind is to remove yourself from it. Accept it as it is and then make it a non-issue in your own mind.

He will do what he wants... you will do what you want...

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

What you focus on, gets bigger.

What we resist... persists...

If you don't like the game or don't agree with the rules... stop playing...

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

Step out of the double bind and you free yourself.