Now separated. Am I doing the right things? Pt 2

[AlkalineThoughts]

When I dropped the kids off this am we first stopped and got some breakfast to go, I also got W a couple of her favorite breakfast items and then I dropped the kids off at W’s apartment. I didn’t point out to W that there was breakfast for her in the bag but I am sure she quickly figured it out. Who knows, this might be borderline pursing.

Rough, this isn't borderline pursuing, it IS pursuing. Remember the whole "No Gift Giving" part of DB/DR? Now I'm certainly no Vet, but just wanted to point that out!

Recently I’ve noticed my posts haven’t had a whole lot of depth to them. It kinda feels like I am in a holding pattern even though I know I need to continue on with my life. Maybe this is what everyone is referring to when they say you need a lot of “patience”. I still can’t figure out the whole concept “do what works”. It’s so hard to pinpoint. I have no clue what is or isn’t working.

Yup, I think this happens to all of us... Waiting to see what happens is the hardest part, and it's the time that the whole GAL thing really helps. I struggle with this a bunch, always wanting to do something to move things in a direction... Then I remember "Nothing Needs to be Done" and get back to GAL, PMA, and practicing patience.

I found it interesting that when the kids came over to my place yesterday the first thing they said was, “ohhhh, cable TV!!!”. The kids were excited because they told me the cable was turned off at W’s apartment. I am sure it was disconnected because she couldn’t make the payment and can’t afford it. Even though I don’t have the money I would love to take care of that bill for them but I already give W $1,000 a month. I also feel confident that if I start offering to take on some of her bills she will then start expecting additional income from me on regular basis and once again I am barely scraping buy as it is.

We never handled finances well when we were living together and it sounds like she’s having a hard time with the finances on her own.

Definitely a good idea to hold off on paying any more bills than you originally agreed upon.

Keep posting, even if it's just journaling. It helps me a ton, and you never know when you'll get some great advice!