Rough: I think im in kind of the same spot in that my posts don't have alot of depth right now either. I feel like im either on here whining about my sitch, or simply journaling because there is so little going on right now that Im not sure what to even ask. I dont know if my current NC is having an affect that i'll see later, or if I need to change strategies and do something different, but at least for now the dark thing seems to be working ok for ME so i'll continue down this road a while. Hopefully its working on her and i'll see the results later on. I guess the best thing to be doing right now for me, and maybe for you to is to simply LIVE.
I do know that I can see baby steps from her, I have to look really hard to see them and im trying to be very cautious that im not imagining them, but i've been trying to look objectively and think that i've seen the smallest of small steps this week so hopefully that continues. One thing that I had heard is that in about a month from now she was planning to file, but im beginning to discount this for a couple of reasons #1 b/c she has started talking to my mom and dad again and #2 b/c unless she's willing to talk to me about it first she has to know that im going to fight her tooth and nail and I still have access to our bank accounts and know full well that she can't afford to file right now.
I don't doubt for one second that she was talking about that to others when I heard it, but I also think that her mind changes pretty often right now because she's unsure of what she wants. Now is the time for me to keep my head on straight and show her what she'll be giving up if she walks. I wrote a small note to myself and have it here on my desk...I stole this last week from a poster, maybe sandi2 but my goal is to "become a spouse that only a fool would divorce" and then let the chips fall where they may.
