can Turtles still stand?

[zig]

Now that the adrenaline surge is gone, how are you?

you know labug - i don't think it was a surge - it's just me now.

of course there's a possibility i could crash, but i'm getting the feeling that this time not.

the door was open - but yesterday it almost closed. it's barely cracked now, and it suits me just fine.

so i am good this morning. i will admit that i don't know if i am using anger to propel me to a new place or not. but i'm not acting on the anger - just acknowledging it.

i've also started exploring why getting ow in my face like that makes me feel done - and if there are any fears behind that. i actually don't think there are - not this time. there's just this sense that no, h you are not crossing this boundary for me.

i have no fear about telling him that i am going to forego going to this party because the chances of you being there with ow are high, and i will not be there because my values do NOT support giving s the impression that it is okay for you to be with another person while we are married and being there will give s that impression.

I cannot control if he takes s there with her or not (right now he has s that night), and am wondering if i should "offer" to take s.

but as mil said to me yesterday - about that night - you need to tell him you have plans - and he'll just have to figure out what to do.

so a bit to consider here. but as i wrote to KD - i have this strong feeling the universe has got my back on this one, and that i actually don't have to DO anything here.

i did not offer yesterday to take s - just pointed out to him that that's what his intention was. when i spelled it out like that - i think even he could see how insane and unhealthy it sounded to do this to s.

so how am i?

good! really good!!

i'm off to do my yoga and meditate before going to the tax acct. to take care of our taxes - now there's a 180 for zig, if ever there was one

how are you today labug? well? i hope?

zig