To Lovingly Detach

[Arsene]

Thanks 25, This last bit you wrote made me feel better. I know there are no guarantees but still, there are possibilities and that is positive, and all I can ask for at this point.

This evening, my W text me to talk about a day out she'd planned with D8. They are going out of town to an event with some friends and in her text, W clearly assumed that I would drive across town to drop D8 at her friend's place. (She didn't ask, she assumed - "we'll talk later about the arrangements to get D8 to my friend's).

I kind of ignored this and replied that I would make sure that D8 would be ready to leave for 8 am and I also asked if there was anything special she (D8) would need.

W then replied that she was thinking that it would be great if I could drop both her and D8 at her friend's.

I probably could have done it but not without canceling my meditation class so I told her that I was sorry but that I had a class in the morning and that I couldn't do it. I then offered to pick D8 up in the evening if she needed me to.

W was clearly disappointed and eventually replied that she would manage and that she would be here at 8. She then asked me to prepare some items for D8's day.

I wish I could help but I'm starting to feel as if she might be cake eating. She was around for the two days of Idul Fitri(when OM was with his family) and today, she distanced herself again and only texted to arrange for D8's drop off.

I suppose that everything was still conducted in a friendly way and I'm happy that I was able to "not be available" for her on this. I am also thankful that I didn't have to make up an excuse but that I did in fact have something to do (which she knows about).

Of course, now my "wasteful thoughts" include how she will manage the situation and if it involves OM. This I won't know as I won't be around when she picks up D8 (D8 will be with landlady) and besides, it's probably better that way.

Still going through hourly (it seems) ups and downs but pushing hard on maintaining PMA.