I feel I'm the better man, quite simply, because of who I am. I am extremely kind-hearted, loyal (sometimes to a fault), smarter-than-your-average-bear, and caring.
I know the above list is rather generic... But I also know that W feels (or at least felt) that way, as she told me such. Even just before she left, W told me that I was the kindest, sweetest person she'd met, that she knows she'll never find anyone who loves her the way I do, and that I'm "Every Girl's Dream Come True"... she just couldn't find her happiness despite being with this "Dream Guy"... Something IC and I hypothesize is because she has a hard time liking who she sees in the mirror...
I know that I would do anything for my W or close friends. I'll gladly put my own wants aside to help someone in need. I'm always trying to make people laugh, and I'm the person that everyone comes to when they have problems and need advice...
I (now) strive to be a better person every day, try hard to learn from my mistakes, and I'm quick to apologize when I've hurt someone.
Okay. I've caught up with all of your posts.
Yes, you answered my question.
Now, what do you know about OM? You said that your W dated him prior to dating/marrying you, right? Did you ever get any insight on him? Others may argue that OM does not matter and that you should move forward not caring about who OM is or what he is doing... I disagree to a point. I believe that it is important to know what you are up against.
What do you know about him? What did your W like about her prior R with him? What did she not like about it? Why did she end it?
^^ If you know...
Originally Posted By: AlkalineThoughts
I think these reasons make me the better person here... Although I might not be as exciting as OM is (especially now) I know that I CAN be extremely exciting, spontaneous, and adventurous... Something that I lost while we were having our issues (and a 180 that's on the list)...
What can you do NOW to be more exciting, spontaneous, and adventurous?
A couple of examples from my sitch...
1) went to a few concerts... my wife found out either from me or from FB postings. Details in my threads. She was ALWAYS very curious about who I had gone with. I was ALWAYS as vague as possible.
2) I took a few trips out of town to visit friends. Something that I had not done much of in the last few years. Again, my W was always very curious about who I was with and what I was doing. In fact, a couple of times she was furious about it.
More thoughts later
These are good examples. ^^^ I think at this stage, people should stop focusing on trying to build LOVE, and instead focus on trying to build ATTRACTION.
There's a difference.
It's like when you're first dating: before you can get a girl to love you, you first have to get her to be ATTRACTED to you.
