If it were me (and it HAS been me!!!), this would be the question I would ask my IC:
"I'm beginning to realize that whatever marital problems I may have, that I really need to get to the root of and begin to address my own PERSONAL contributions to the dysfunction. And what I'm asking for help with is, what is it about me that would make me want to continue to pursue someone who is cheating on me, and why does it make me so sad that -- even in her CURRENT DESTRUCTIVE PATH -- I can't be with her? I want to figure this out, and learn to lay out and enforce healthier boundaries and build healthier self-esteem, so that WHATEVER my wife decides to do about THIS marriage, I will be healthier in my FUTURE relationships. Is it co-dependence, or something else?"
