Ah dammit. Backing off. Doing nothing except what I have been doing. Working on me and now continuing to ignore the W in specific ways.
I honestly don't want you guys to think you're wasting your time with me. I'd be completely lost if that's the case. I really need some support here. Some direction and meaning.
One thing I can tell you is tha there's no damn way I'm going to walk away. No damn way I'm going to contribute to the "end". No damn way I'm going to be swayed away from the path I choose.
Just need a tiny tiniest hint, nudge, whatever maybe from someone on the other side of a sitch like this. I can only read what happened the last time this happened. The journey. The stopping points to view the scenery. The trip across the pits and the end of the trail (I thought). During that trip there WERE stages where we both gave a bit. And someone had to start that process.
As it now stands there are two people. Each staring at the other waiting for the other to blink. What must I do? Wait for her to blink. Wait for her to notice my improvements (she already has). How much improvement must there be before I can "make the first move".
Starsky I truly value your friendship and your guidance. I'm really getting lost in the "waiting" stage. Two months and counting. Two months of saying "no can do in this sitch as it now stands". What the heck is going on here. I'm getting as confused as she is.
