yep more detaching needed. Trust me I've watched H do all sorts of things that he never did when we was with me and then I remembered he did do those things in the beginning. And now he's back to wanting his own time more and more.
I agree with Keep_Going if you want to wait for things to happen when he will do them in the way you want them done then you'll be waiting a long long time. Part of the reason you split (I imagine) is that he didn't do things how you wanted (you mentioned him not putting time in the house) so that's not really going to change all of a sudden.
I don't agree with how my H lives his life, the choices he makes, how he pays bills, or what he spends his money on. But I have no control over that.
Ask yourself what you get out of making him put more work into the house and divorce proceedings.
He's doing even less of being responsible since you two separated I don't think that's going to change
