DB Bootcamp - zig and sgctxok, and various

[zig]

thanks vera - i had also decided, for lack of knowing any better right now, to say the same things as you suggested.

in some ways i feel it is a passive approach - because i have not been to talk to a lawyer yet.

i'm struggling with that - i don't know if it's because of the money - that's what i'm telling myself. but to be really candid, i think it's because i don't want to deal with any of it and avoid it altogether.

and that brings me of course to what i am facing within myself - how i avoid painful things , or things i don't want to do by putting the responsibility on someone else.

one could say it's different here - h is the one who wants this, but to tell the truth, if i agree to co-operate, then i should be doing my part here.

as for him controlling by cancelling the mediator apptmt because i would use a lawyer - i actually sense that he was looking for an excuse - any excuse to do so.

he made that apptmt within days of coming back from seeing ow - all fired up about being with her. and then a week later was so irritated with her for being upset when he said she could not come, and i can't help but wonder if he is rethinking what he's doing

of course - speculation - but it is combined with a certain amount of observation and intuition on my part here. but what do i know - i'm not in his head

all i do know is that he jumped on that so fast huffing and puffing about it all, that it seemed a rather odd reason to use to cancel

any insight would be welcome

thanks zig