MrsD thats a real shame that your H is making something other than his son #1. Its a real battle I have right now as far as fighting for my marriage goes. I posted a little about it on my thread but the gist of it is that if she really wants a D she knows if she offers me custody that i'll probably sign off on it and let her walk. I dont think its because I choose my S11 over her, but more because if I dont im afraid I could end up with only the standard every other weekend visitation and I have zero interest in being a part time dad.
Its interesting you mention it b/c I dont think my son talks to my wife about his sitch.....he talks to me about it maybe once a week and has questions or other feelings he needs to get out, but when he's home with her he's usually on the playstation, or according to him she's always texting or on the phone so I dont think she ever sits down and actually spends time with him. They are there together, but much like she and I did in our marriage being present doesn't really mean anything if your in two differnt worlds. I think if she would take the time to sit down and talk with him she'd see how badly he's hurting and might have to slow down a second and think about the long term affects on him of what she's doing.
But thats what a WAW does right...rationalize....rationalize that the kids will get better...rationalize that its ok to have and EA or PA b/c in their mind the marriage is over...rewrite history so that there were never any happy times in the marriage...its a sickness but all you can do is improve yourself and give them time and space and hope they come out of it....lots do, some never do.
