How things are improving Part Deux

[Starsky309]

And should I even both or carry on with the status quo?

That depends on one thing, and one thing only:


Is the status quo working for you?

[pookie69]

The meals were part of the arrangement. Her L said I can't evict her.

Are you serious?

Her L told you to feed her cake?

I think there is a difference between not ABLE to evict someone, not CHOOSING to evict someone and not choosing to make creme brûlée for her late at night.

You need to find you mojo and dust it off.

Doormats are not respected by anyone.

You can handle it better.

[kat727]

Maybe you can't evict her but you could lock your pantry. Treat her as a roommate. I normally say the mailman but you wouldn't have the mailman in the house with you. The point is the same be cordial but think to yourself...Would I be doing x,y or z for the mailman? If the answer is no well there you go. She isn't the person you married right now...quit expecting her to be.

Sorry if I am off base here but I have only read the most recent thread.

kat

[mac-ct]

Kat your anything BUT off base.

Thanks so much for pointing out something that I should have realized by now.

The W isn't. And treating her kindly as I would a friend. And that's as far as it goes.

Thanks kat!

Mac

[mac-ct]

Pookie - thanks for that.

Mojo is back. Doormat lookalike sure isn't on the menu

Thanks

Mac

[mac-ct]

Starsky - what a star and a guide through troubled times you are.

I've taken what you said firmly to heart. So much so it's now in my notes on my iPhone.

Thanks so very much. Going to make that list for if she actually turns up. I'm also going to start with the approach. Not going to rely on her to start any chat.

Thanks again.

Mac

[Starsky309]

Starsky - what a star and a guide through troubled times you are.

I've taken what you said firmly to heart. So much so it's now in my notes on my iPhone.

Thanks so very much. Going to make that list for if she actually turns up. I'm also going to start with the approach. Not going to rely on her to start any chat.

Thanks again.

Mac

Mac, I know I'm hard on you, but -- like with everyone here to whom I post -- I'm just trying to help you avoid some of the same mistakes I made.

When you get a chance, head over to my "Transparency" thread (p. 1) and click on the links and check out my own backstory. You'll see a lot of the "scripts" I'm recommending, and there's a ton in there about how to break the whole "entitlement princess" bit, too. My wife was world-class in that department, LOL.

Peace,

Starsky/Puppy/Chocolateeyes

[mac-ct]

Starsky I'm beginning to understand why you seem to be hard on people. It's actually not you. It's the process that people need to go through. That's harder for some than others.

For you to have stuck around after your well earned success is quite frankly a miracle. And one that all here should feel indebted to you kind sir!

I for one am grateful for your help in getting my feet firmly back on the ground and my head pointed in the right direction.

The threads are a gold mine. It's going to take a while to sift through them.

Thanks starsky. I'm going to sleep much better knowing that theirs people out there who care about people like us.

Have a great day and a fabulous weekend. I am

Cheers and - here they come - zzzzzzzzzzzzzz

Mac

[Starsky309]

Thanks, Mac. If you want to cut to the chase (chaste?) with my sitch, go to May - Aug 2007. That's when my wife had her affair, and I did most of my DBing. The earlier threads (and all of the "Chocolateeyes" ones) deal with my SSM.

[mac-ct]

Starsky will do. Now you've ripped me away from something robx was saying to dcsuk - back after 4 years! Some people never learn

Mac