One other thing...this is just my opinion...I don't think you have fully ACCEPTED your reality at the moment (BOTH intellectually AND emotionally), and your confinement within it.
This, and needing to be "right" and black/white thinking are keeping you a bit "stuck" at the moment.
ACCEPTANCE ---> road to peace, road to compassion, road to detachment, road to thriving, not just surviving...
At least that's how it worked for me...your mileage may vary, of course.
Something to think about....
T^2
In the depths of winter, I finally learned that within me there lay an invincible summer. - Albert Camus
Uncertainty is the very condition which impels people to unfold their powers.-Eric Fromm
