More patience??? Really???

[ces67]

Thanks Ad, like the song says, "we all need somebody to lean on." Yeah, I'll be singing that most of the day today. Which is actually a bit of a change since the last song I heard on the way home last night was Donna Summer's "Hot Stuff". I was whistling that all night at the house. However, I don't think my W picked up on the hint...

Journaling:
I can tell my W is processing a lot right now. Whatever it is, my speculation would only be mind-reading. She's distracted, not meeting my eyes in conversation, keeping responses rather brief. There is a lot going on in her head right now. I asked if something was on her mind last night and she said "no".

On the flip side, she's been busy too. The house is completely cleaned, the laundry is all caught up, she's staying busy with her work and picked up a new student to tutor. And I woke up this morning to find her in bed next to me. That's 2 nights in one week.

She is also being somewhat conscious of how she responds to me. I had asked her a question about her new student and she gave me a very short answer. Then a few minutes later she walked past and made a point to explain a bit more about the boy, what grade he was in and the fact that he is high-functioning autistic.

For me, I'm working through my feelings and setting them down. I think its important for me to process this and get my arms around it a bit more before going back to MC.

Piecing is interesting to say the least. I realized how easy it is to get drawn back into interpreting all the various actions & activities. I think there's a balance to letting my W know I want to work on our M and that I care about her and at the same time, detaching in a way to not get caught on the roller-coaster.

I've always felt "balance" was something I did well in life but I moved from a relatively flat surface to a 2-inch beam about 10ft off the ground. So I get off balance more often. The fall doesn't kill me but it sure stings..