I was just logging in when I saw your post. Water came spewing out of my mouth (in laughter) when I read:
Quote: I need to find other ways of satisfying my hunger and hunter tendencies so that I don’t make my fish dinner out of natural instinct. I need to teach my fish that his real thoughts can come to the surface and the solution doesn’t have to be mine.
It's more a long the lines of a Finding Nemo visual of Anchor talking to Mr. Ray on a shrink's couch and the visual was just too much for me. Sorry. I find humor in very odd places...
Oddly enough, your post DID address taking on the PA man. As I have mentioned before, Mr. W. seems to only be that way with me, though he has made a lot of progress in this area since August.
I'm going to have to give myself a lot of credit for duct taping the buttons that drove him there. But he deserves some credit too, for learning how to develop some more aggressive behaviors (for a fish, so this is all relative).
This is quite a balancing act for me. I am still struggling to find the perfect way to show I care without being pursuing, but give him enough space without making it seem like I don't. I have an unfortunate past with my friendships with men and near-death experience with OM. I can't make him jealous, because he will see that as the death knell.
So I have to do this daily 12-step program for sharks so I don't do anything that takes any of those behaviors too far.
Damn, if I had known this on my wedding day, I might have turned around at the altar. What a weiner he is.
He phoned back to give me the info about the golf tourney, and asked my opinion about teeing off at 7:30 vs. 8:00. I said stupidly, "I don't know. What do you think?"
He said, "Well, if I say 7:30, I'm going to have to be out at the course (an hour away) at 4:30 am for set up, so I'm inclined to tell Ray that 8:00 is better."
I said, "I agree with you." Good for me. I said I was turning this project over to you and I really am.
Then he asked about D9. I said, "Well, she's at home with cousin." He said, "Does she have the flu?" NO, you dickwad. Your change in living arrangements has her nervous as an old lady crossing the interstate.... I merely told him her stomach was upset and he'd have to ask her when he gets to the house later on.
This convo I could tell that he was different than in the recent past. For one, in my initial call to him he seemed distracted and down in the dumps. When he called me back, he seemed a little anxious. I don't think I helped by not calling him on last night's phone convo (which I see that he fully expected me to do and I didn't play by those rules), but guess what?
I really don't care.
He's brought this on himself and he can work himself out of his little mess. I will continue to remain neutral, polite, considerate, kind-hearted, cooperative and detached. In other words: DB my butt off.
Wow, don't look at it, though because it still follows me around wherever I am!
Betsey
"There are only 2 ways to live your life. One is as though nothing is a miracle. The other is as though everything is a miracle."
