a new perspective

[strongerthanever]

Oh man today jacked me up. I was doing sooooo good with acceptance and just being happy and in the moment.

Seeing H this morning brought to life so many emotions. Love, for the man I still believe in, anger towards the way I allowed myself to be treated, sadness for all the times he became my enemy when I needed my best friend.

I don't know what these mean as I'm too "in the moment" to have a different perspective. Lord you would think after 8 months of living apart these emotions would have been replaced by now.

I don't know what anything means, it's just crazy how affected I am from a simple 15 min interaction. What I do know is I need to step back. These emotions need to be addressed, but ate telling me something here. these aren't healthy emotions to be hanging onto. I want my happiness back!

Jamie has some more detaching and sitting still to do, I do believe.